I am shadow

I am shadow
defined by obscured light. still, unmoving
off-color grey

I am withered sapling
broken and blighted before the first blooming
dried-out husk

I am stagnant pool
of rain, after torrents of violence and thunder
stale water

I am cracked voice
at the end of a long held beauteous tune of tranquility
shattered bronze

I am decayed velvet
a garment never worn. deteriorated former splendor
tattered and rotting

I am shadow.

arrh

grr. the Mother track on my copy of Live on the Black Hand Side is fucked.

fuck.

all one. alone.

ah. might as well try and get some matters straightened out. getting them down white on black usually helps a little.

the problem I mentioned isn't quite straightened out, but the chances it's a regular misunderstanding has increased. I'll make some inquiries tonight.

went to Leon's last night. cozy. but still uncomfortable. need to break the stranglehold of procrastination. I'm blocking myself.

BadCop interviewed The Cooper Temple Clause and Mortiis yesterday. he was all but totally exhausted when I met him at Elm, where I made some arrangements with Narrenschiff. gonna help him out with an installation he's creating. role-playing, like.

I hurt my family by neglecting to call them. and when they call, it's usually at very inconvenient times for me. what can I say? every conversation seems to end up revolving around matters I need to do anyway, and they're only the controlling instance. remote control for you. but still, they're family. family is important, and my conscience nags me to keep contact with my kin more often.

nowadays I really like to keep to myself. but it doesn't seem like I'm really capable of taking care of myself. at my age. think I've begun to sport real addiction symptoms. I've known I have it in me.

"Some cunts are just so predisposed tae skag..." -- Irvine Welsh, Trainspotting

going to see Furia tonight for gods know which time. let's take an inventory.

1. 3-year-anniversary of John Dee
   
2. Zoom 00, opening concert
   
3. Zoom 00, finals
   
4. invited friends-only concert
   
5. Zoom 00, tour (2-5 at So What!)
   
6. support for Raga Rockers at Feller
   
7. indep concert at Blå
   
8. indep concert at So What!
   
9. unannounced concert at Mono
   
10. and tonight at John Dee

think I'm a fan yet?
I'm gonna be buying 3 copies of their EP for sure...