smoking kangaroos and watching Captain Cigarette

been eating toast again. and playing Fallout. all night.

I hoped I could make this a productive evening. guitar practice, advancing in the Latin lessons, lyrics writing, etc. since I wasn't supposed to meet anyone, I mean.

I like it alone, but there's no telling if I'm really fit to take care of myself (discipline dysfunction, I know).

ah, but the night is still young. I could be alright in a while. fire up the laptop and strike up the word processor. but first I'm of a mind to step out and shop new comics in the videoshop.

my gods, I respect people who work at 24/7 convenience stores. all hail.

got to check my other email account (which I because of circumstances generally can't do more often than once a week), and it seems I won that Twisted Forever tribute CD. should be cool, looking forward to impress Kjinge and Leon with that one.

"...the bad guys are winning. we need to step up."

I want to tell clever, insightful, compelling, emotional, and true stories.
this is my long-term goal.

to this end there has been made available to me a set of utilities.

this includes various forms of performing and visual arts, as well as audible, obviously.

I also want my stories to be noticed, although this is commonly equated with "being commercial." short note: when the storyteller refines the story to the point where the storyteller becomes entirely transparent and the story itself seizes one hundred percent of the attention, then it's "noticed" in my book.

but the choice of medium requires careful thought. I have previously addressed the dilemma of balancing between reaching out to (and indeed coming through to) as many heads and hearts as possible while at the same time keeping true to the original expression, the emotions and the themes contained in the stories.

and so finding the medium with the most quantity/quality-effective ratio is a staggering task. relatively inexperienced technically and falling short of the lingual capabilities of native English speakers, I should consequently really turn to photography.

I have had a taste of:

• photography
  
• game design
  
• music writing
  
• music interpretation
  
• comic manuscript writing
  
• poetry
  
• short stories
  
• children's books
  
• digital arts
  
• drawing

aside: if the digital artists using Paint Shop Pro and digital "composers" using relatively cheap programs such as eJay (as advertised on EmTeeVee) would indeed be accepted as artists per se, then certain arts are going to be as truly democratized as the writing of short verses has become. for isn't the tweaking of sampled sounds, or the distorting of pre-acquired images comparable with the assembly of predefined words into phrases and sentences? whose copyright is the scale or the alphabet or the colors of the spectrum?

back on topic: I honestly feel I have been the most effective as a poet. recalling last year's publishing house sponsored poetry night at Blå, I remember thinking that there is a shitload of lackluster word churners out there with nothing to tell me whatsoever. what's good is good, tho.

"It's the ones with the least to say that will be heard" -- Bent Sæther, The Nerve Tattoo

"In our times, the need for expression is far more developed than the actual content of everything going to press." -- Jostein Gaarder, The Ringmaster's Daughter

I intend to contend by content.

(wow!! I didn't mean to be that eloquent! =) =) is it an ominous sign of ill portent for my ego to be impressed with myself already? heh.)

should go home soon. go to work. idleness while waiting for inspiration is a thrice damned waste of time, on par with, uh, sloth.

some problems with the ads tonight, that's why I'm late. and I was supposed to visit Leon as well... but I have had a lot to do.

had a wonderful idea I mean to try out on Sat... let's see if I can find time to prepare it properly.

and when I'm at last ready to post, poor LJ has had a power outage. poor people.